I have done a boudoir shoot before and it was horrible. In my first shoot I didn’t feel beautiful. I felt as though everything I was insecure about was highlighted, but my session with Quinn was OUT OF THIS WORLD! I walked in and automatically felt welcomed and I wasn’t as nervous. I would feel the energy in the room and knew that Quinn just knew what to do and how to do it properly! Quinn showed me how to get into every pose, told me where/ what to move. She was patient. She even went to the extent of moving hair out of my face or positioning curls in just the right spot, to even helping me and lending me her stockings to wear for the shoot! This experience was INCREDIBLE!
I did this shoot for a few reasons actually. The main one was for myself. I often follow the quote from Rupaul that says, “If you can’t love yourself, how the hell are you gonna love someone else?” I felt like I needed something in order for me to fall back in love with myself again! I was self conscious and feeling really down with all the lockdowns and quarantine and covid taking over so I just needed something to help me love myself again! I had also just gotten a huge thigh tattoo that made me just feel like a bad bitch! So why not show it off and feel sexy!
My story is a long one but if you bare with me, I’m willing to share. Starting way back in 2010 I was diagnosed with Crohns or Inflammatory bowel disease. I lost so much weight, you could perfectly see all my bones, I lost my hair in clumps and I never had any energy and just wanted to sleep all day... went through test after test at the hospital and for a few years no one could figure out what was wrong. Being only 10 years old then, I didn’t understand completely myself. I felt worthless, I didn’t feel pretty, people would bully me for how I looked or how skinny I was or how much hair I had lost. Finally after figuring out that I had crohns and figuring out with medication would finally work. I gained my strength and started to feel better physically and mentally. I started to like the way I was looking and I felt beautiful. A few years past pass and it’s 2018 and I thought I was living life to the fullest! Got into my first relationship and thought everything was going great! A year and a half later, I was cheated on by someone I thought had loved me. I’m sure I’m not the only one that has gone through something like this, but I don’t envy anyone who does or has before... it makes you feel like you weren’t good enough, weren’t pretty enough, that you didn’t do enough to keep him. You put yourself down and take the blame and question. That was one of the hardest things I’ve had to come to terms with. But I picked myself up, told myself I don’t need a man to be happy and I built myself better than ever. This shoot was a reminder and a gift to myself that I am beautiful! I am strong enough to go on by myself! And love MYSELF before I love anyone else! I feel good in my skin and seeing these pictures, I wouldn’t change anything for the world.
Overall my favourite part of this experience was seeing the final product! The edited pictures were GORGEOUS and I had such a hard time trying to pick my favorites!